Be Great Today!

I have had the good fortune to have been mentored by Starbucks Chairman Howard Schultz, Dell’s founder Michael Dell, Virgin’s CEO Richard Branson, creator of such hits as Survivor and The Apprentice’s Mark Burnett, actor Sylvester Stallone, Wendy’s restaurant founder Dave Thomas, billionaire investor Warren Buffett and literally hundreds of other famous, successful, and wealthy individuals.  How can an average guy like me from suburban Detroit gain access to all of this world-class talent?

 The answer to that question is thru the books that they have written.  All of these individuals and for that matter, individuals in every field, industry, and nation have shared their secrets to success in print for hundreds of years.  The answers to any question that you may have are in print at your local Barnes & Noble, Border’s Books, or online at Amazon.com just waiting for you to dive in and scoop up the treasures from page after page of answers to how these people overcame seemingly insurmountable odds to rise to the top of their respective fields.

 Further, you have people in your life: parents, siblings, teachers, coaches, neighbors, bosses, and friends who are achieving every day what you want.  Understand that not everyone in life is going to understand your hopes and dreams.  We all have different opinions and view the world from a slightly different lense.  It can be hard to understand sometimes why loved ones or people you admire have a different view from you when it comes to your dreams.  Just remember that your dreams are just that, “yours” and belong to no one else. 

 If you are operating from a base of integrity and life is giving you signs that whatever you may be striving for is a good thing, then by all means, forge on, and stick to your path.  Realize that some or all of the people listed above may not want to see you succeed because of their own insecurities or competitive nature to always have to be on top.  Just keep pushing on.

Dream Big!

What mentors must have in order to help you:

1. Have your best interest in mind. The mentors that you select must have your best interest in mind.  This may seem obvious but is not always the case.  Your mentors must truly value you as a person and want you to succeed.  Your mentors must want to give you wings that let you fly free on your own terms in your own time frame.

2. Not have an alternate motive for self gain, at your expense.  You must have a win-win relationship where you both gain.  Your mentor must not provide conditional assistance which would limit your growth to not surpass the mentor’s abilities.  Your mentor should want you to be the best you can possibly be and want you to surpass their capabilities and accomplishments.

3. Have already achieved or helped others achieve what you desire.  Your mentor must be a person that is either living what you want to live, lived what you desire to live, or coached others successfully on how to live the way that you want to live.  A mentor who hasn’t walked in the shoes that you desire to walk in or helped others achieve their dreams will not be able to get you where you want to go.

4. Exhibit integrity in all of their actions in life.  If your mentor only does what is right, when it is convenient, then you will learn other shortcuts that could lead to a dead end, and other problems, instead of true happiness and success.

5. Be honest with you about both your strengths and weaknesses.  If your mentor only tells you what you want to hear instead of what you “need” to hear, then the mentor will not be doing you any favors.  A good example of this was an episode of the reality show, So You Think You Can Dance?  One of the contestants brought his mother, who said he was great.  Was he really great?  Mom convinced this guy that he was great, and the supposed dancer said as much to America.  When it was time for this contestant to strut his stuff, it was evident that he had never danced in public, ever.  Forget the fact that he had never had any formal dance training, he had no rhythm or skill whatsoever.

When you are fortunate enough to have a mentor or role model in your life, whether it’s for a short time (in the form of a boss or coach), or for your whole life (in the form of parents or a spouse), the key is to respect that person and have an open mind, heart, and spirit.

Live, Learn and Pass it On!

We had a beautiful snowfall a couple of weeks ago, and my daughters had great fun building forts and sledding down the hill in the back yard for a couple of days.  On the second day of play, I asked my youngest daughter, Megan, why she hadn’t used certain sections of the yard.  She informed me that Anne Marie, the oldest, had instructed the group to save those areas.

I let Anne Marie know that if they wanted to have fun with the unused snow, they better use it today because the temperatures were going to climb into the 40’s the following day, at which point the snow would be gone.

That got me thinking… what am I or any of us not using that we should be?

? Time, we only get each day once?

? Access to family, friends, neighbors, or co-workers? 

? Are we allocating our financial resources properly balancing today and tomorrow?

? Saying “I Love You” to that special someone?

? Forgiving those who hurt you?

How do we know when we should use one of the above, knowing that we risk losing it as the alternative?  I believe you know when :

1.     You know who you are as a person and what you are capable of.

2.    Your priorities are lined up with your values and in sync with your capabilities.

3.     Your taking responsibility for your daily choices and actions.

4.     Your utilizing your God given abilities, or natural strengths to the best of your ability.

If you’re focused on paying attention and developing the above traits, you’ll know when to use it or lose it!  Just as it’s important to seize opportunities when they present themselves, it’s equally important to let other opportunities pass you by.  The opportunities to lose would consist of those being harmful to your health, wealth, or well being.

So next time your playing in the snow, try to remember that sooner or later the snow is going to melt, so you might as well have fun now!

Have a great day!

Do you want more out of this life of yours?  As far as I see it, you have 2 choices, (1) be the example yourself by leading, or (2) follow a great example.

First, who to follow?  A person, movement, or organization that would be a great example to follow is any that makes the world a better place by being here.  This doesn’t have to be anyone or anything that is big and splashy, just one that follows the Golden Rule… “Do onto others as you’d want done onto yourself.”

An example of this is the late, great Mother Teresa.  Mother Teresa’s name is synonymous with lover, generosity, giving, caring for the less fortunate, dignity, and hope.  But, I bet you weren’t aware of this information. 

In studying Mother Teresa’s life, after her passing, if the world wasn’t aware of the inspirational influence that she provided, you would not draw the same conclusion.  Journal entries speak of uncertainty, despair, and darkness.  Each morning, those feelings were pushed aside as Mother Teresa rose to care for the sick, hungry, and poor of Calcutta, India.  This daily action resulted in a mission that lives on after Mother Teresa’s death.

When Mother Teresa’s, Missionaries of Charity was passed onto her successor in 1997, the society had nearly 4,000 sisters, 300 brothers and more than 100,000 lay volunteers who oversaw 610 houses in 123 countries.  Overcoming daily uncertainty, despair, and darkness can have some truly amazing, blessed results.  Mother Teresa of Calcutta is truly one of the greatest examples to follow!

Now, how to lead!  You don’t have to be or become rich from a monetary standpoint to be a great leader.  You simply have to put good into the world, take action, one day at a time.  How do you do that?

1.     Smile at fellow humans as you pass them throughout your day!

2.     Offer warm greetings or well wishes to loved ones and strangers alike!

3.     When you’re talking with others genuinely listen and be in the moment!

4.     Take time to notice nature and give thanks for its beauty!

5.     Phone a friend, just to say “hi!”

Note: there is a common thread in the 5 options above.  They are all free!  No money needed. 

Share and give freely and you will receive so much more in return than you could have ever imagined.  Guaranteed.  Mother Teresa didn’t have it easy, and she didn’t have an agenda, other than giving God’s love to God’s children, each moment of each day of her life.  What a blessed life and what a beautiful, lasting legacy!

Great results are guaranteed for you, whether you approach the day and your life as a leader or follower.

Pay It Forward!

… to happiness, fulfillment, making a difference, finding and following your passions and purpose, or… to being completely and utterly miserable?

My wife had to make a stop at the grocery and office supply store the other day.  A little background on my wife:  Sherri has a huge heart and is an active optimist.  What I mean by that is that Sherri chooses to be optimistic each day and makes the extra effort to be polite and cheery with people she encounters throughout her day.

So, Sherri is at the checkout line at each stop and greets each cashier with her brilliant smile and genuine inquiry as to how each individual was doing!  The response was less than reciprocal.  Each cashier made minimal eye contact, mumbled something that was inaudible in response to Sherri’s well-wishes.  These two individuals were committed to being miserable. 

Here are 3 keys to overcoming negative influences and encounters in your life:

1.     Give a smile and a calm, reassuring “Good Day!” well wishes!  The reason for this is that you never know what another person is going thru.  These unhappy souls may be going thru a family or personal crisis or could be dealing with the loss of a loved one, or some other genuine problem or concern, causing their frown or sour attitude.  You just never know what is going on in someone’s life.

2.     Focus on your blessings that life has bestowed upon you, and live in a state of gratitude.  We can’t control how other people act or feel, but we surely can control how we look at and approach the world and this God-given day!

3.     If options 1 and 2 aren’t working, then simply stay away from these people!  At least minimize your contact with the naysayers, if you have to interact with them (i.e. co-workers, family, neighbors, etc.)  If someone is committed to being miserable, guess what… they will surely achieve their objective.  Life is too short to make it your cause to try to turn the committed miserable ones around. 

So, there you have it, three ways to deal with negative people that are inevitably going to be presented to you and me each and every day.   So, please remember to focus on your blessings, live with an attitude of gratitude, stay committed to your course, and …

Have a Great Day!

So what’s going to get you off the bench of life and into the game in 2010? 

We all have something in our lives that we’re not engaging in, but know that we need to.  What are you putting off, delaying, or otherwise avoiding for whatever reason?  Maybe you’re scared, bored, fear failure, fear success, or are just stuck in your current position on the bench watching life go by.

Whatever it is that is preventing or limiting you from getting into your game, it’s time to put the reasons preventing you from entering your game aside and start after it.  Let me share with you a fool proof 3 step process that will get you off the bench and into the game.

First, I’ll share with you what has gotten me off my bench and into my game for 2010…  In the fall of 2009 I was diagnosed with a rare, chronic disease called Mixed Connective Tissue Disease (MCTD).  MCTD is an autoimmune disease. Here’s how it works: my immune system thinks my body is sick and has decided to go into defense mode; thus it starts attacking itself.   With this disease, my immune system can go after my organs, skin, joints, etc.

Long story short, I have this disease, IT DOESN’T HAVE ME.   I’m doing everything in my power to control it.  I’ve chosen to change my diet, by cutting out sugar, alcohol, dairy, and gluten.  Further, I’m getting proper rest each day, exercising daily, and limiting stressful situations, which as a sales professional on commission, makes for many challenges and obstacles to overcome. 

But guess what?  I’m winning!  Thanks to my amazing wife and soulmate Sherri, my two beautiful daughters’ presence and strong spirits, and my faith in God.  My disease may have come to live within my body, but I’m not going to let it stop or limit me.  I’m getting off the bench and will continue to play in the game of life.

Now, back to our 3 fool-proof steps that will get you off the bench and into your personal game of life:

1.     Write down what you want and why you want it.  If you come up with a strong enough why, you will be able to achieve any what.  Also, make sure that what you want and the reason you want it involves more than just gratifying yourself.  It is so important to come up with goals that serve others and serve a greater purpose.  As Zig Ziglar says, “if you help enough other people get what they want, you’ll get everything that you want!”

2.     Keep it simple!  At least simple enough, that as life gets busy, as it inevitably does, you will be able to juggle your dreams and goals as you’re engaging in the other areas of your life that require your attention, i.e.: school, studying, parenting, work, marriage, health, etc.

3.     Just Light Into It!  That is what my friend, Freida, who used to clean and iron my work shirts when I lived in West Virginia answered when I asked her how she was able to keep up with her typical mound of weekly ironing for her customers!

Hope to see you off the bench and on the court in 2010!

Happy New Year!

How often do you find yourself asking others what to do when you know the answer already?  Maybe, you don’t like what you know needs to be done and feel it’s easier to ask others in hopes that someone will give you another option which will allow you to not do what you know needs to be done.

You need to step up to the plate, and use your head.  Think!  Listen to your gut!  That feeling in your belly will guide you along your path and help you make the right choices.

Still having trouble deciding?  Grab a pen and paper.  Write down the issue at the top of the page, and put a line down the middle.  On the left hand column write the pro’s of the issue and on the right hand column write the con’s.  Now that you have the issue from all angles written down, leave it alone for awhile.  Come back throughout the day, and review.

If you need to solicit advice, do so after you have already done the above.  You will have more perspective, be able to ask more intelligent questions, and most importantly, be able to make a more intelligent decision!

Now you’re ready to make things happen! 

 Have a great day!

It is very important to be competent, capable, and hard working in order to experience success in your life.  Have you ever noticed how our society associates success (whatever success is for you) as the key to life.  We seem to put a premium on results, the end product, and who gets ahead the most, is viewed as the best.

I believe that there is a more important ingredient to success than just climbing the corporate ladder, amassing a certain income, net worth, toy, or title.  To me, the happiest and most successful people are the ones with character and integrity.

Having a strong character and well, internalized firm value system is the real key to happiness and success in this world!  My high school basketball coach is one of the “wealthiest” people I know.  I’m not talking about monetary wealth.  This kind of wealth is priceless, yet costs no actual dollars. 

Coach always had and continues to have bedrock strong values.  Coach stands for something: which is working hard, never backing down from a challenge, and doing the right thing every time, not just when it is convenient.  The final value is called integrity.  The payout for this kind of wealth is unconditional love and respect from those whom Coach knows and interacts with.

I learned many lessons from Coach during my years playing basketball for him, but most of all I learned the importance of character and integrity.  Think back to people in your life that helped shape who you are today.  Remember the lessons you learned, and bring them forward into today, and continue to live the way your “coach” taught you.  (If you didn’t have a person like that in your life, feel free to borrow from my experiences in these paragraphs.)

Leading a life of integrity, doing the right thing every time, not just when it is convenient, will be a life changing philosophy for you.  I guarantee it!

Have a great day!

The other day I was waiting in line at Starbucks, and the gentleman in front of me ordered a Venti (large) Latte.

While I was waiting for my drink, the man in front of me received his Grande (medium) Latte, from the Barista (guy that makes the drinks).  This customer stares at his drink for what seemed like 30 seconds, then he looks up and stares at the Barista.  Then he stares back at his drink for a prolonged period of time.

Finally, the guy, with a not too happy look on his face, turns and leaves.  Why didn’t he tell the Barista that the incorrect drink was prepared?  This guy was clearly upset by receiving the wrong drink.

All this guy had to do was speak up!  “Excuse me sir, you made the incorrect size drink for me, I ordered and paid for a Venti.”  That was all this unsatisfied customer had to do to become a satisfied customer.  Starbucks works hard to please their customers, but they’re not mind readers.

Now, this guy went off into his day, dissatisfied.  How many times have we been dissatisfied by what someone has done to us, or said to us, or not done or said to us?

Save yourself some heartache and irritation, and speak up!  The sooner you incorporate the ability to speak up into your communication tool bag, the sooner you will be able to eliminate unnecessary irritations and frustrations!

Have a great Day!

The legend of Pandora from ancient Greece offers an amazing lesson for us still today.  As the story goes, Pandora was given a mysterious box by gods jealous of her beauty.  Pandora was told that she must never open the gift.  What do you think she proceeded to do?  You guessed it… she opened it!

 What Pandora released when she opened the box was some really negative things: disease, greed, vanity, envy, pining, and madness (these vices aren’t on the top of my list of wants).  Pandora was able to shut the box just in time to preserve the antidote that provides meaning to people’s lives… hope.

 Hope, modern researchers are finding, provides a suprisingly powerful role in life.  I can’t believe that it took these researchers this long to figure that out.  Hope keeps you strong!  Hope gives you a reason to believe!  When you have hope, you have faith (belief in the unknown)!

 Live with an expectation of good things to come into your life today and in the future.  Dream big dreams, then put the plans into place to make your dreams reality.  This all begins with hope, the foundation of faith.  The key is to do this one day at a time.  If you live with hope and faith each day, you will live a happy life!

Have a great day!